The 'buck stops here.

Dude. It is so fucking cold I am sat in my living room with my coat and scarf on. Still a month behind on the rent so can't really justify heating when I'm already watching a dvd and running the washing machine and I'm the only one in the house. Then I checked the london temperature right now and its 7•c (44•f)

That's not even really cold. Basically I have two thermostatic states related to my food index - overeating and putting on weight (warm) or maintaining/losing weight (cold)

I think its a bulimia throwback or something. And I am dieting right now because my weight's drifting rapidly upwards. I am saving cash by eating what Ned brings home from the restaurant but it comes in "portion" sizes and their portions are a little too generous for someone of my height and (lack of) musculature.

Man I miss exercising but my days completely wipe me out whilst somehow not actually contributing to my actual physical state.

Ok enough about my giant belly. Oh wait, one more thing. The better behaved half of the class was allowed to come out and 'help me tidy away the toys' (muck about while I tidy away the toys)

So they got one of the plastic tea set spoons, filled it from the water fountain and chased me very slowly round with it. They decided throwing it on my belly would be HILARIOUS but when they saw my multiply pierced belly button they all just FROZE. They are so fascinated by my piercings. They like to stick their fingers through the holes in my ears. I love them. I don't know why, at least a third of the mums have some sort of lip stud. P's mum has a really nice set: one upper (gold, centre) one lower (silver, centre) and her skin is really dark so the effect is amazing. Imagine me wearing one dark blue and one dark purple. Awesome.

On a related note, my brother just started working in a school with 8-9 year olds and his lip ring is purple atm and one of the kids took the piss because 'purple is a girl's colour' lol.

I might get kept on at the current school permanently which is exciting. I'm also working one-to-one with an autistic kid when he requires that sort of attention and we're getting on pretty well so I don't imagine the school will want to change his TA cos he's gonna need one pretty much permanently.

I went to my therapist appt over 2 weeks ago and when I went to see the reg doctor he hadn't heard yet. Is that good or bad? He doubled my meds too so I might actually cheer up a little soon. The last month has been REALLY up and down. Mixed episodes: no thanks.

Jfcjfc. Remember last week when I said spooks last week was the hottest ever?

THIS BEATS IT OUT OF THE WATER. IT MAKES LAST WEEK LOOK LIKE A TURD. FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK ITS SO HOT IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY

Dude, there's a time team special on more4 right now in my local park (shoreditch park) and then they showed my local pub where we win the quiz every week (the rosemary branch) w00t

Ust heard my first xmas song. Was in the pound shop trying to find candles that melt at a masochist-friendly temperature and Happy Xmas (War is Over) came on. It actually eased a smile into my facehole.

I am gonna start bringing tissues with me on my morning commute, regardless of whether I actually need them. Every single day I am stuck next to either a mouthbreather or some gross person who sniffs like every second. Like, if you have a snotty nose, how hard is it to shove some bog roll in your pocket before you leave the house? It's FUCKING DISGUSTING.

SORRY FOR MY RETARDO POST LAST NIGHT. IT IS GONE NOW.

Getting pissed (drunk, not angry) in a camden pub. Ultimate pasttime for any goth/punk/alternative individual. Shit, it's 6 o'clock! Book of blood in an hour! Must finish my pint and head home.

Can't sleep. Sucks. Grumpy tortoise again. Bloody hell. Why am I only happy at work? Because kids are better than adults, that's why. Roll on Monday.

Jesus cunting motherfucking arseraping christ. This spooks has the hottest rarmitage scene EVARRRRRRRR

Hardly any for 45 mins then THIS.

Dude. Bsg 3x20. The music is coming out already. Does it really happen that early? And the painter has already disappeared!

(I think that's cryptic enough to avoid spoiling anyone who hasn't watched it yet?)

People. What's their appeal exactly? Why won't adults look strangers in the eye or touch each other? Don't be retarded, I'm serious. Most close friends of mine apologise if they have brief skin-to-skin contact with me. What the fuck?

People should touch more and there wouldn't be quite as many cunty misanthropes like me floating around. Most platonic friends of mine would run a mile if I just tried to hold their hand whilst walking down the street. It's probably about age 11-12 that english kids get awkward about close physical contact and after that it's family and lovers only. It is fucked up and it's probably why so many people need therapy. And eye contact is even worse. Are my eyes that ugly? Am I that intimidating? Fuck you and your lack of humanity.

Dude. Am watching the boxing match ep of bsg s3. The hottest ep of anything ever. All those meaningful looks and meaningful punches. UNF.

And I don't think I'm spoiling when I say OMG THE END OF THE EP THE BEST WAY OF DOING IT EVARRRRRRRRRR

I'M WRITING MY HEAD OFF!

Dude, I am so fuckin' bored. Bored of sims2, bored of gta ballad of gay tony already, bored of tv, bored of my flatmates, BORED.

Want to get drunk but avoiding the calories. Have totally porked up since the wedding.

Mate, guess where I am now! I'm watching zz top at wembley with my dad and my hubby. Want to attatch a pic but not sure black Barry can cope with that.

I feel kind of disconnected. I assume 90% of brits will be aware of the Jan Moir Furore (pronounce it so it rhymes) and if you're not, google 'jan moir stephen gately'.

Charlie (brooker, derpderp) has been linking to Stephen Fry's blog re: the whole debacle. They were two of the main people to rouse complaints about it, down to the Daily Mail (Jan Moir's paper)'s persecution of the bbc during Sachsgate - a little tit for tat, if you will. The mail was encouraging people to go and complain about Sachsgate, so Charlie and Stephen, 2 leading lights in the bbc's armoury, saw a chance for a little ironical payback. But now, what with Stephen Fry's blog going all soft suddenly, and Charlie linking it, I am pissed off. Charlie got a lot of death threats and hate mail about 3 years ago for making a Guy Fawkes/George Bush joke - lightheartedly suggesting in an english newspaper that maybe to bump Bush off would do more good than bad. Stephen (for those who didn't click the link) was asked about the Holocaust (he's Jewish and lost some family during it) and said (he admits thoughtlessly) "well, let's not forget which side of the border Auschwitz was in" (ie in Poland) and pissed off some Poles who thought he meant something by it. Jan Moir's been pleading the same case, saying "I'm not really a homophobe who thinks all gay men do is fuck, drink and take drugs, I was being tongue-in-cheek."

You know what? Even if it's true, even if she is no more bigoted than Charlie Brooker and Stephen Fry, that doesn't make it ok. Charlie joked about killing a president; a man who was widely disliked and was alive and well and healthy. A man who many others announced they wanted him dead in much more serious terms. Stephen Fry made a flippant comment about Auschwitz; insensitive, possibly, but it was regarding an atrocity that was commited over 60 years ago against his own people.

Jan Moir made unpleasant innuendoes about a man whose death was a horrible, fateful accident. She heavily implied that had Stephen Gately been a straight man he'd be healthy and walking around. She made these innuendoes less than three days after he died. He leaves behind a husband, a mother and a father. These people did not need, want or deserve some bleached-blonde middle-class bitch wondering aloud about the dirty secrets hiding in their dead loved one's closet before he was even in the ground. Charlie and Stephen's comments may well have offended people, but there weren't any recently bereaved (or recently dead) people specifically involved in their offense.

I am really pissed off that they've climbed down on this. I say again: even if Jan Moir is not bigoted, the sickening thing about this is the FUCKING TIMING.

Ok, I got work this morning. That's good. But ilford is ugly as hell, man, even in a pretty dawn.